Chris Jones
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Captain's Log #3 2012

5/11/2014

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19 days without alcohol and I can safely say there have been no noticeable side effects.

The Believers of the Magical 29 is going from strength to strength, though admittedly finding other followers has been harder than I first thought  – and I have begun to notice a strange, inexplicable force at work.  I have been urging all my friends to join in the faith, again and again, and, mystery of mysteries, they seem to be disappearing!!!  When I ring them up the phone is answered but all is silent when I speak and the phone goes dead!!!  I have visited their houses and knocked on the door 29 times but no one answers – and yet there are cars in the driveway!!!!  Stranger still, some times I see the curtains moving as though some was in there!!!!

The answer came to me in a dream sent by 29 doves.  There is a force out there working again the Magical 29 –and  I know what it is – the Believers of the Awesome 28.  The poor misguided fools.  As if there was ever anything special about 28!!!  They really are just bunch of crackpots with a ludicrous belief system!!!  I have tracked the high priestess down to her chapel in Bungwahl and thrown 29 stones on her roof.  I have hidden three of her gnomes (ha – now she only has 25 – horror of horrors) and one her swans cut from car tyres will never been on this earthly plane again.  That should rattle her.

I have created a special lash with 29 tails to scourge any unbelievers, though I must confess there have been problems. The damn thing weighs a ton and the tails are always getting tangled, so it’s really more of a metaphorically scourging. Still, it’s the thought that counts.

Of course, dear reader, no doubt one great question must be preying on your mind – how can the Church of the Magical 29 only have one follower???  Never fear, my friend, that answer also came to me in a dream, carried by 29 hamsters.  I have created my own believers, out of cardboard.  Now, everywhere I go 28 cardboard cut-outs trail along behind, all connect by a sacred cord.  To be honest, it has made getting around fairly difficult and there was the tragic loss of Trevor the 15th, during the sudden downpour the other day.  His soggy and waterlogged passing will long be remembered, with a mixture of joy and sadness.  Still it has certainly caught people’s eye when I pass – they always point and whisper.  I think this hold promise for securing my first non-cardboard follower.

Perhaps it might be you???

I haven’t quite got the M29 website up a running yet, so in the meantime perhaps you’d like to donate to another worthy cause.  Simply head to:

http://www.febfastfundraising.com.au/chris_jones_97

and make whatever  contribution you can.  The cause is really worthwhile and I promise they won’t be ringing you 29 times a day to seek a donation.
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    Chris Jones

    This blog is a mixture of experiences, light moments, humour, ponderings and observations. Which pretty much sums up living.

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