Attacking a dangerous enemy who isn't there is one of the more attractive forms of warfare ... (J)
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Experience had taught him never to say things like 'I don't like it, it's too quiet.' There was no such thing as too quiet. (J)
... he was suffering simultaneously from claustrophobia and agoraphobia. He was afraid of everything in here and everything out there at the same time. (J)
To history, choices are merely directions. (J)
... history was full of the bones of good men who'd followed bad orders in the hope that they could soften the blow. Oh, yes, there were worse things they could do, but most of them began right where they started to follow bad orders. (J)
The city of Genua had run out of royalty, inbreeding having progressed to the point where the sole remaining example consisted mostly of teeth ... (J)
'Tell me, sergeant, are you of a nautical persuasion?'
Colon saluted again. 'Nossir! Happily married man, sir!' (J) ... what was so special about 'special qualities'? Limpets had special qualities. (J)
The Librarian shyly held out a small, battered green book. Vimes had been expecting something bigger, but he took it anyway. It paid to look at any book the orang-utan gave you. He matched you up to books. Vimes supposed it was a knack, in the same way that an undertaker was very good at judging heights. (J)
No-one could be so simple, no-one could be so creatively dumb, without being very intelligent. It was like being an actor. Only a very good actor was any good at being a bad actor. (J)
After all, when you seek advice from someone it's certainly not because you want them to give it. You just want them to be there while you talk to yourself. (J)
... you couldn't really imprison someone like Leonard of Quirm. The most you could do was lock up his body. The gods alone knew where his mind went. (J)
'One of the advantages of horses that people often point out,' said Vetinari, after some thought, 'is that they very seldom explode.' (J)
'Can't argue with the truth, sir.'
'In my experience, Vimes, you can argue with anything.' (J) 'I hope you are not impugning my men, sir.'
'Vimes, Sergeant Colon and Corporal Nobbs have never been pugn'd in their entire lives.' (J) ... he listened with great care because what people said was what they wanted him to hear. He paid a lot of attention to the spaces outside the words, though. That's where the things were that they hoped he didn't know and didn't want him to find out. (J)
Detritus's intelligence wasn't too bad for a troll, falling somewhere between a cuttlefish and a line-dancer, but you could rely on him not to let it slow him down. (J)
People live for ages side by side, nodding at one another amicably on their way to work every day, and then some trivial thing would happen and someone would be having a garden fork removed from their ear. (J)
Mustrum Ridcully believed that knowledge could be acquired by shouting at people ... (H)
Ponder was a great believer in logic, in the face of all local evidence ... (H)
Like most people with no grasp whatsoever of real economics, Mustrum Ridcully equated 'proper financial control' with the counting of paperclips. (H)
... people like Ridcully are never, ever embarrassed about anything, although often people are embarrassed on their behalf. (H)
'Willow bark,' said the Bursar.
'That's a good idea,' said the Lecturer of Recent Runes. 'It's an analgesic.' 'Really? Well, possibly, though it's probably better to give it to him by mouth,' said Ridcully. (H) The senior wizards gathered round, ready to help those less fortunate than themselves remain that way. (H)
'That's the thing about gods. They'll always find a way to, you know ... hang on.' (H)
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The world has lost Sir Terry, and it's so much the poorer for that. Vale Sir Terry. Categories
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