Shepherd's Crown by Terry Pratchett
Being dead didn’t mean you couldn’t get angry, oh no. (SC)
But the reward for lots of work seemed to be lots more. If you dug the biggest hole, they just gave you a bigger shovel … (SC)
Om was handily silent, thereby enabling his priests to interpret his wishes how they chose. Amazingly, Om’s wishes rarely translated into instructions like “Feed the poor” or “Help the elderly” but more along the lines of “You need a splendid residence” to “Why not have seven courses for dinner?” (SC)
‘Always thought I’d be the first to go, what with my drinkin’ and suchlike, especially the suchlike. I’ve done a lot o’ that.’ In fact, Nanny Ogg had done a great deal of everything, and was commonly held to be so broadminded that you could pull her mind out through her ears and tie a hat on it. (SC)
‘... I know many people of power, people who have so much power that they don’t have to use it.’ (SC)
...to be a witch you needed to be sensible, so sensible that sometimes it hurt. You dealt with the reality - not what people wanted. (SC)
‘I’m on the sharp end of witchcraft, which means doing what should be done as best you can. It’s all about the people, Mrs. Earwig, not about the books.’ (SC)
Granny Weatherwax was like the prow of a ship. Seas parted when she turned up. (SC)
… dreams that come true are not always the right dreams. (SC)
“Enough” wasn’t really a long enough word to describe the numerous little tasks any young woman marrying into the Ogg family found were expected of her. (SC)
Any man with sense was wise to be fearful of a wife’s best friends. For who knew what ... little secrets might be shared. (SC)
The allegiance of elves is spiderweb thin and the currency of Fairyland is glamour. (SC)
… he knew exactly how to make a short word like “suffer” turn into a very long experience. (SC)
Miss Tick knew too that you can find out a lot about somebody from what’s in their pockets, and sometimes a lot about them from what they don’t have. (SC)
It was a brave man indeed who could look upon a clan of Feegles and not want to tie the bottoms of his trousers together. (SC)
‘... it’s always useful to be friends with any witch.’ She smiled sweetly and added, ‘I’m feeling friendly at the moment ... but I might not later.’ (SC)
Why were elderly witches so nosy? But then she thought: Actually, all witches are nosy. It’s part of what being a witch is. And she relaxed. (SC)
‘Our skills, you will find, could be our jailers.’ (SC)
“We aren’t the kind of people who kill those who are unarmed."
Rob Anybody put up his hand. “Excuse me, mistress, but some of us do, or are.” (SC)
A witch is always on the edge, between the light and the dark, good and bad, making choices every day, judging all the time. It was what made her human. (SC)
“Somebody had to taste the first snail.” (SC)
… if a witch started thinking of anyone as “just” anything that would be the first step on a well-worn path that could lead to, oh, to poisoned apples, spinning wheels and a too-small stove …. (SC)
“We’re witches, Tiffany. We has the power for a reason. We just ‘as to make sure as it’s the right reason …” (SC)
“Humans need other humans – it’s as simple as that.” (SC)
“We humans definitely need other people to keep us human.” (SC)
It appears to be a fact of life that if two or more well-born ladies should gather together, cupcake are essential. Otherwise the ceiling might fall on them. (SC)
… it was clear that when curves were being handed out, Letitia had been at the end of line. (SC)
Magrat took a cake by its little case rather carefully. Some of Nanny Ogg’s recipes could include …. unusual ingredients, and she already had three children. (SC)
‘... even elves has soft parts that don’t like no boot in ‘em.’ (SC)
“Where there’s a war there’s a Nac Mac Feegle.” (SC)
Could they do it? They were old men. And then he thought, Yes, they are old men. They have been old men for a long time, which means they have learned many things. Like lying, and being crafty and, most importantly, dissembling. (SC)
Granny Weatherwax was indeed here. And there. She was, in fact, and always would be, everywhere. (SC)
“The magic was already here.” (SC)
The End. (SC)
But the reward for lots of work seemed to be lots more. If you dug the biggest hole, they just gave you a bigger shovel … (SC)
Om was handily silent, thereby enabling his priests to interpret his wishes how they chose. Amazingly, Om’s wishes rarely translated into instructions like “Feed the poor” or “Help the elderly” but more along the lines of “You need a splendid residence” to “Why not have seven courses for dinner?” (SC)
‘Always thought I’d be the first to go, what with my drinkin’ and suchlike, especially the suchlike. I’ve done a lot o’ that.’ In fact, Nanny Ogg had done a great deal of everything, and was commonly held to be so broadminded that you could pull her mind out through her ears and tie a hat on it. (SC)
‘... I know many people of power, people who have so much power that they don’t have to use it.’ (SC)
...to be a witch you needed to be sensible, so sensible that sometimes it hurt. You dealt with the reality - not what people wanted. (SC)
‘I’m on the sharp end of witchcraft, which means doing what should be done as best you can. It’s all about the people, Mrs. Earwig, not about the books.’ (SC)
Granny Weatherwax was like the prow of a ship. Seas parted when she turned up. (SC)
… dreams that come true are not always the right dreams. (SC)
“Enough” wasn’t really a long enough word to describe the numerous little tasks any young woman marrying into the Ogg family found were expected of her. (SC)
Any man with sense was wise to be fearful of a wife’s best friends. For who knew what ... little secrets might be shared. (SC)
The allegiance of elves is spiderweb thin and the currency of Fairyland is glamour. (SC)
… he knew exactly how to make a short word like “suffer” turn into a very long experience. (SC)
Miss Tick knew too that you can find out a lot about somebody from what’s in their pockets, and sometimes a lot about them from what they don’t have. (SC)
It was a brave man indeed who could look upon a clan of Feegles and not want to tie the bottoms of his trousers together. (SC)
‘... it’s always useful to be friends with any witch.’ She smiled sweetly and added, ‘I’m feeling friendly at the moment ... but I might not later.’ (SC)
Why were elderly witches so nosy? But then she thought: Actually, all witches are nosy. It’s part of what being a witch is. And she relaxed. (SC)
‘Our skills, you will find, could be our jailers.’ (SC)
“We aren’t the kind of people who kill those who are unarmed."
Rob Anybody put up his hand. “Excuse me, mistress, but some of us do, or are.” (SC)
A witch is always on the edge, between the light and the dark, good and bad, making choices every day, judging all the time. It was what made her human. (SC)
“Somebody had to taste the first snail.” (SC)
… if a witch started thinking of anyone as “just” anything that would be the first step on a well-worn path that could lead to, oh, to poisoned apples, spinning wheels and a too-small stove …. (SC)
“We’re witches, Tiffany. We has the power for a reason. We just ‘as to make sure as it’s the right reason …” (SC)
“Humans need other humans – it’s as simple as that.” (SC)
“We humans definitely need other people to keep us human.” (SC)
It appears to be a fact of life that if two or more well-born ladies should gather together, cupcake are essential. Otherwise the ceiling might fall on them. (SC)
… it was clear that when curves were being handed out, Letitia had been at the end of line. (SC)
Magrat took a cake by its little case rather carefully. Some of Nanny Ogg’s recipes could include …. unusual ingredients, and she already had three children. (SC)
‘... even elves has soft parts that don’t like no boot in ‘em.’ (SC)
“Where there’s a war there’s a Nac Mac Feegle.” (SC)
Could they do it? They were old men. And then he thought, Yes, they are old men. They have been old men for a long time, which means they have learned many things. Like lying, and being crafty and, most importantly, dissembling. (SC)
Granny Weatherwax was indeed here. And there. She was, in fact, and always would be, everywhere. (SC)
“The magic was already here.” (SC)
The End. (SC)
