Chris Jones
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Jack Jackrum quotes

'Bein’ a soldier is not hard.  If it was, soldiers would not be able to do it.'  (MR)

'You’re at home with the writin’ and readin’,’ grumbled Jackrum.  ‘You can’t trust the people who do that stuff.  They mess around with the world, and it turns out everything you know is wrong.'  (MR)

'Never talk to people who write things down.'  (MR)

‘There is only three things you need to remember, which are, viz: one obey orders two give it to the enemy good and hard three don’t die.’ (MR)

'General Tacticus said the fate of a battle may depend upon the actions of one man in the right place, sergeant,’ said Blouse calmly.
‘And having a lot more soldiers than the other bugger, sir,’ Jackrum insisted.  (MR)

'He’s a sergeant, and they don’t deserve no respect at all sir.  I should know.  They’re cunning and artful, if they’re any good.  I wouldn’t mind if he was an officer, sir.  But sergeants are clever.'  (MR)

'... I think there’s no rule to stop me beating seven kinds of crap out of you until you tell me why you came here and when the rest of your mates are going to arrive.  And that may take me some time, sir, because up until now I’ve only ever discovered five types of crap.'  (MR)

‘A famous last stand, sir?’ said Jackrum. He spat expertly into the fire in the tumbledown hearth. ‘To hell with them, sir. That’s just a way of dyin’ famous!’ (MR)

'So don’t any of you go thinking you can be artful about this, because when it comes to cunning, I am Mister Fox.'  (MR)

'Too many lies and there’s no truth to go back to.'  (MR)

'The army’s a piece of piss compared to running a pig farm and looking after three lazy brothers.'  (MR)
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